


Guys My Age

by edawn1



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Age Difference, Alternate Universe - High School, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst and Porn, Explicit Sexual Content, F/M, Inspired by Music, Mutual Pining, No Underage Sex, POV Rey (Star Wars), Porn With Plot, Sexual Tension, Size Difference, Smut, Teacher-Student Relationship
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-06-06
Updated: 2018-07-11
Packaged: 2019-05-19 02:20:39
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 16,304
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14864804
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/edawn1/pseuds/edawn1
Summary: Guys my age don't know how to treat meDon't know how to treat me, don't know how to treat meGuys my age don't know how to touch meDon't know how to love me good*Rey thought she was entitled to make some mistakes. She had technically reached adulthood, after all. If she wanted to sleep with the mysterious older man she met at a bar, then she would.The problem is that sometimes you can't walk away from your mistakes. Sometimes they show up to teach your fifth period Physics class.





	1. The Mistake

**Author's Note:**

> Rey’s sneakers smacked the damp pavement as she tore through the center of town. It was late, probably even close to midnight. The sky was filled with dark clouds, but luckily the main street had an adequate amount of street lamps. She ran down the road, shifting between alternating shadows and light.

She was dressed only in cutoff jean shorts and a plain black tank top. A cool summer breeze was cutting right into her, sending goosebumps over her skin. She hadn’t planned to go anywhere tonight. She just wanted to sit quietly in her room for a little while, chatting on the phone with Finn about their plans for the last week of summer vacation.

Plutt storming into her room was not a part of the plan. Plutt nearly breaking her door off the hinges and hollering at her in a drunken rage about some inconsequential mess down in the shop was also not a part of the plan. He had ripped the phone out of her hand and chucked it at the wall with all of his strength. She was almost certain it was broken beyond repair but she didn’t check it to see, she was too busy trying to duck and evade a meaty fist swinging for her head.

Plutt rarely hit her, only maybe two or three times in her life, but he was getting antsy. She was eighteen now, she didn’t belong to him anymore. She could leave whenever she wanted and he was afraid of that. He relied on her for everything, he didn’t know shit about repairs and he needed her in the shop so he could continue to sell shitty used cars for exorbitant prices.

Oh how she wanted to leave him. He deserved it for being such a shitty guardian her entire life. Part of her wondered if her parents knew just how shitty he was when they left her with him, did they know what kind of life they were condemning her to?

Unfortunately, she still had a year left in high school. Even though she was eighteen, she was a year older than the other kids. She wasn’t stupid or anything, in fact she took a lot of pride in her academic record. When she was very little, right after her parents left her, she ran away from Plutt and missed a lot of school so she had to make up for that lost time.

If Plutt actually paid her anything for her work in the shop she could at least get her own apartment, or rent a room in someone else’s. He wouldn’t dare give up agency over her though, he knew she would get out from under his thumb as soon as she was able.

A very small, very sad part of her also secretly hoped that her parents would come back for her one day and how would they contact her if she ran away from Plutt?

She clenched her fists and ran harder.

So many times she had thought about reporting Plutt for the way he treated her, maybe she could get lucky in the foster system and find a nice family that loved her. Or maybe she would get stuck with someone worse than Plutt, at least Plutt didn’t get physical outside of the handful of times he has tried to hit her. So she held her tongue all those years and now it was too late. The world viewed her as an adult and she could only rely on herself from now on.

Her feet slowed as he realized she actually had no clue where she was running to.

Finn must have some idea of what happened after Plutt abruptly ended their conversation by shattering her phone. She didn’t want to show up at his house this late and get him in trouble though, he was already grounded for sneaking out last week past his curfew to see Rose.

Rey knew that Rose lived with her older sister alone and thought that maybe she wouldn’t get in trouble if she showed up at her door, but Rey felt a sweeping wave of embarrassment at the thought of having to explain her home situation to Rose. They weren’t that close yet.

Instead of running straight out of town, Rey slowed down to wander. All of the businesses on main street were locked up tight. Except one.

The tiny bar at the end of the street, right by the canal that runs through town. It was called ‘Big Shots' or 'Hot Shots’ or something like that, but it was really just a place for all the men in town to have their after work beer and socialize.

The sky looked like it was about to open up at any moment and pour down buckets of rain. Rey weighed her options and decided she could hide out at the bar for a while until she was sure Plutt would be passed out enough for her to sneak by him and get back into her room back at home.

She didn’t suspect anyone would recognize her there, especially not the midnight crowd on a Tuesday, but she still looked painfully young. She tugged the neckline of her tank top down a bit to expose the tiniest hint of her dark blue bra. Luckily she wore a decent one today, it was edged with a tiny bit of lace and hopefully that was enough to distract the bar tender enough to not ask questions about her age. She didn’t have much cleavage to speak of, but her breasts were pert, so they could swell up out of the cup just enough to draw the eye. Normally, she hid under layers of clothes, but she had to work with what she had. She was nothing if not resourceful.

The bar was chilly, a tiny AC unit was grinding away in the corner and it seemed like it was enough to make this place downright frigid.

She scanned the dark room, there was a currently unused pool table, a handful of small round tables and a long wooden bar that looked like it had a sticky film over it from the day’s patrons.

She didn’t want to hesitate too long and draw attention to herself so she chose the bar, it was empty at the moment and she chose a seat off to the side.

There were a handful of other patrons, a middle aged couple at a table by the jukebox and a few older men drinking and telling stories at one another.

The bartender glanced up from where he was wiping a cup and his eyes flitted over her face and then down to her chest, it looks like her bra was doing the job she intended.

“I’ll have a Coors Light, please,” she asked without prompting. She gave him a tight smile. He raised an eyebrow, probably at her accent, which she still maintained from her childhood in London. She could probably lose the accent if she wanted, adapt more to America and blend in, but she still clung to it. Maybe it would make it easier for her parents to recognize her one day.

He poured the beer, deposited it in front of her, and ambled off to do some work on the other end of the bar.

She fiddled with the glass in front of her, sliding it around a bit on the sticky bar top and every once in a while taking a sip from it. It was kind of an odd feeling, not having her phone on her, but it was also peaceful. She tried to eavesdrop on other conversations but people were mostly quiet and kept to themselves.

The door she had entered only ten minutes ago slammed open and her heart leapt into her throat, for a gut-wrenching moment she thought Plutt had somehow found her. She swiveled on her stool to look at the entrance and her shoulders relaxed when she saw a man she had never seen before enter.

She had been right about the sky looking suspiciously like it was about to rain, this guy was soaked from head to toe. He looked up through a curtain of damp, black hair and his eyes locked onto hers. She swallowed.

Even though she turned back to face the bar, she was acutely aware of the new stranger’s presence. He stalked up behind her and dropped into a seat nearby, leaving only one stool between them.

She attempted to stealthily observe him with a sidelong glance. He was big, both tall and thick. He was wearing dark slacks and a dark red button-up dress shirt, but she could see the way the fabric stretched over his arms when he reached into his pocket to pull out his phone and drop it on the bar. The fabric of his pants clung to defined thighs.

He shoved a hand into his hair to get the wet mass out of his eyes and then she noticed he was looking back at her. Maybe assessing her in the same way, judging by his eyes which were dragging up her bare legs. His gaze stopped to linger at her chest, she felt suddenly hot and embarrassed about tugging her shirt down. His eyes locked onto hers once again.

“How old are you?” He blurted out.

She bristled at that.

“Twenty-one.” She hated the lie as soon as it came out of her mouth, but she didn’t want to draw attention to herself drinking at a bar underage.

He raised an eyebrow but shrugged and shouted an order to the bartender. Whiskey, neat.

“You’re not from around here.” Rey wasn’t sure why she was talking to him. She should be laying low. Something about him was magnetic.

“Yeah? And you are, with that accent?” He sipped the drink that appeared in front of him, regarding her carefully with dark eyes.

“I was born in London, but I’ve been here a while. Long enough to know that people in this town don’t dress like that.” She dropped her eyes to his clothes and back to his face. She wasn’t an expert on fashion, but even she could tell the designer quality of the clothes he wore. His black shoes were so shiny she was sure she would be able to see her face in them if she got close enough.

“I was born here. I left, now I’m back.” He didn’t look like he was in a mood to give more of an explanation, so she was surprised when he continued. “Family stuff.”

“You should have stayed gone. This town is a hell-hole.” She was talking quietly now, almost as if she was saying the words to herself, but she still observed him. He had an interesting face, it was long and sad, but still handsome. He had a kind of lopsided mouth with plush lips that she wanted to know the texture of.

She didn’t miss his eyes on her mouth either.

She took the opportunity to hop seamlessly over to the stool between them so she was now next to him. She dragged her beer along the bar with her.

His expression didn’t change from that dark, brooding look, but there was something else in his face now. Interest.

He was interested in her. Sure, maybe just for sex, but it made her feel all warm and melty inside. He was older than her, she knew that for sure. She would say around thirty at least, if she had to guess. He had a baby face, but she could see some very faint lines forming around his eyes when she was this close.

The way his big hands closed around the tiny whiskey glass made her shift in her seat. It felt good to be wanted by someone, even if it was this mysterious stranger at the bar.

“Why don’t you leave then?” His voice was lower now, like he didn’t want anyone else to hear. His whole big body was angled towards her.

“It’s complicated.” Rey took another sip of her beer, giving her time to think of a way to explain it that didn’t involve letting him know she was still a high schooler. “I can’t leave my job right now, my boss - he would kill me.” All true.

The stranger scoffed.

“Fuck him, he probably needs you more than you need him.” He looked genuinely pissed off on her behalf. Her body felt even warmer, a fuzzy feeling erupted low in her belly.

“Yeah, well, maybe soon.” She shrugged, the motion drew his eyes down to her top that was barely clinging on to stay up over most of her bra. She noticed the long fingers that were wrapped around his whiskey glass twitch.

She felt powerful when he looked at her like that. Like she had something over him, this strange man that just happened to stumble in here the same night as her. Maybe they were both running from something.

“I’m Rey,” she whispered in a voice that came out breathier than she thought it would. She leaned an elbow on the bar and cocked her head, observing him more blatantly while simultaneously exposing the long line of her neck. It drew his eyes.

“Kylo,” he responded, matching her whisper.

She didn’t want to examine what she was about to do. She was sure if she looked too closely then she would realize she was doing this for all really wrong and really unhealthy reasons. No, she was an adult and she could make mistakes if she wanted to.

“Want to get out of here, Kylo?” She sucked down the last of the beer and dropped the empty glass back to the bar. 

His eyebrows shot up, maybe he wasn’t expecting such a forward approach from her, but he nodded his head quickly and downed his own drink. He pulled a crisp twenty out of his wallet and dropped it on the bar between their empty glasses.

“Let’s go,” he murmured and held his hand out to her. She slipped her tiny hand into his overly large one and shivers that had nothing to do with the chilly atmosphere slid down her spine.

They exited into the night and she was surprised how muggy it had become after that brief rainstorm. He was leading her down the street and they stopped in front of a sleek, black, and brand new looking Mercedes S-Class which was parked just off the main road.

“Holy shit,” she murmured. “This is a really nice car.” She wanted to run her fingers lovingly over it, but she was afraid her hands would leave smudges on the waxed surface so she held back. She looked over her shoulder at him suspiciously. “Why would you ever come back to this town?”

He shrugged like the car didn’t matter. His eyes were practically devouring her now, much less subtle than he had been in the bar.

Heat pooled in her lower stomach as he took a step towards her. His expression was raw and almost pained. Those soft looking lips were parted and if she was taller she would have dove in to kiss him that second, but she hung back and let him take the lead.

Her sexual experiences up until this point were… limited. Last summer her and Finn had stumbled through some nervous groping and eventually even more nervous penetration. Afterwards they both felt kind of sick about it and decided to never speak of it again. Their insane friendship chemistry didn’t translate to romance. Then Finn met Rose and that was that.

This didn’t feel like that at all. Kylo wasn’t a teenage virgin, he was a man. A small voice in the back of her head told her that he would take care of her. An even smaller voice in her head taunted her, telling her if she had real parents she wouldn’t be trying to sleep with a much older man she met at a bar, but she squashed that down.

Kylo took another step to her and she pressed her back into his passenger side door. He folded his body down so he could run his nose along her exposed neck. She gasped at the contact, she had been expecting a kiss. This felt so much more intimate.

He gripped her hips tightly with both hands, pinning her there against his car. She squirmed in his grip and he held her tighter. She liked that.

His lips found her pulse point on her neck and closed around it, sucking the sensitive skin. Her breathing picked up and she arched up into him.

Finally, finally, he pressed his body into hers and she felt his erection. A thrill came over her when she realized how hard he was for her. She just wanted to be wanted, if only for tonight.

She rocked her hips against him and he groaned into her neck, wrapping his arms completely around her waist and tugging her close. He licked and sucked at her neck like a starving man and she let him. She wanted so much more.

“Kylo.” She panted and the balmy summer air did nothing to cool her overheating body. “Please.”

A low growl rumbled out of his throat and he pulled back. She whimpered at the loss of contact.

“What do you want from me? I need to hear you say it.” He looked stern with his eyebrows furrowed together and his mouth in a hard line, despite his swollen lips.

“Please, I want you,” she gasped, trying to reach for his neck to pull him down to her level again.

“Be explicit, I need you to say it, Rey.” He reached out and skimmed his fingers down her cheek, over her neck, and along the slight swell of her breast. Fingertips danced along sensitive skin, leaving a traill of heat in their wake.

“Please, fuck me, Kylo.” She said it with as much confidence as she could muster. It felt wrong to say, but she liked it. Maybe she would say it again.

He groaned and fumbled for the latch to the back door of his car.

“Get in,” he commanded and she obeyed. He gently covered her head with his hand when she entered so she wouldn’t bang it on the doorframe.

The windows were deeply tinted. No one would see them in here.

He dove in after her and shut the door with a deafening slam. She almost laughed at how cramped his tall figure looked in the back seat, that is if it wasn’t for the heated look he was giving her.

“Take off your shirt.” He said in that soft, even voice that made her want to _obey._

She tugged the tank top over her head easily and dropped it to the ground. He scooted close to her so their thighs were pressed together and he reached up to cup her cloth covered breast. The bra was tight, but not padded and he had a clear view of her hard nipples straining against the cup.

He moved closer and she thought he was going to unhook her bra but instead he dipped his head and took one of her breasts into his mouth, as if he wanted to devour her. He mouthed at the cloth and made it wet with his saliva. She moaned and arched up into his mouth in response. He moved his mouth over to the other one and Rey thought she would blackout from how good it felt.

As he mouthed at her, he soothed a hand over her stomach, stroking the soft skin. Every time his fingers got to the waistband of her shorts she thought he would move to unbutton them but he didn’t. The teasing was driving her insane.

“Please, Kylo, please fuck me.” She said it again because she knew he liked it and she truly wanted him to get on with it before she burst into flames.

He popped off her breast and he looked at her softly.

“Good girl, you know I like you to tell me what you want.” He cupped her cheek and it felt so tender that her chest threatened to crack open. What she wouldn’t give to get more praise out of him, she wanted to be his good girl more than anything.

“Take off the rest of your clothes,” he murmured and peppered kisses over her cheek.

She quickly obeyed, unhooking and shrugging off her bra and then pulling her jean shorts and underwear down in one swift movement, kicking to the floor as she toed off her sneakers.

He watched her silently, his mouth still hovering near her face. His breath cooled her warm skin and flushed cheeks.

“Lean against the door and spread your legs so I can see you.” His voice was tender but the command made her hurry into his requested position.

She let her knees fall apart and she felt painfully exposed until she saw how sweet his expression was. He looked in awe of her. His jaw was slack and he looked at her with hooded eyes through his eyelashes.

“Beautiful,” he whispered. A large hand cupped her knee and ran down her thigh, slowly and softly. When his fingers reached the apex of her thighs he reached out and pressed a finger into her slowly.

She bucked up onto his hand and whimpered, trying her hardest to stay still for him.

“You’re so wet for me, aren’t you?” He leaned closer and nipped at her knee as he pumped his long finger in and out of her.

“Yes,” she gasped in response. “Please, touch my clit.” She couldn’t help but moan the words.

A smile passed over his face.

“Of course, you are being such a good girl, you deserve it.” He pressed his thumb lightly to the sensitive bundle of nerves and he circled it with quick motions.

The feeling inside of her built up to almost unbearable proportions. If this is what he could do with just one hand, she couldn’t wait to see more. 

She tried to keep her eyes open so she could watch him watching her. He leaned over her, his gaze switching between her face and her pussy. When she felt close it was like he could tell, his tongue darted out briefly to lick his lips and she went over the edge.

She nearly blacked out as she came on his hand. It felt so unlike any orgasm she had ever given herself. The waves of pleasure that radiated from her stomach all the way down her thighs and to her toes rolled over her relentlessly as he continued to push his finger into her throughout her orgasm.

Her breath came out in quick pants as she tried to compose herself. She looked up at him and he withdrew his finger, bringing it to his own mouth and sucking her juices off it. His eyes fluttered closed like he was savoring a delicacy. If it was possible, she flushed an even deeper shade of red.

“Do you still want me to fuck you, Rey?” His expression was soft, non-threatening. Like if she said, ‘no thank you’ he would bow out respectfully and let her go on her way. It made her feel safe. Most guys probably wouldn’t ask.

“Yes, please.” She nodded enthusiastically and a wide grin split his face.

“Good, it might be easier if you turn around since it’s a tight space.” He guided her onto her knees so she was facing out the window and he was behind her.

He lunged for the front seat while she got into position and he stretched to reach the glove compartment and produce a condom from it.

The sound of a belt buckle and zipper in the quiet confines of the car sent a thrum of anticipation through her. She had half a mind to turn around and see him but at the last moment she thought it might be better as a surprise. He tore the foil packet and she felt him moving behind her, putting the condom on. Then he was positioned at her entrance.

Their moans were simultaneous as he notched the head of his cock inside of her.

“Are you ready for me?” He was short of breath now.

“Yes,” she nodded. 

He pressed into her slowly, so slowly, but he was still splitting her open. She didn’t even know that cocks came this big. Her mind went blank at the impossibly full sensation.

“Are you with me, Rey?” She could tell he wasn’t seated all the way inside of her, she wanted him to get it over with already, but he was holding back.

She nodded again and this time instead of answering she pressed her hips back in one smooth motion and took the rest of him inside of her. She cried out at the stretch of it and he reached around to pull her to him so her back was flush with his front. Her bare skin rubbed against the soft material of his dress shirt.

“Good girl,” he murmured into her ear softly as he rocked into her ever so gently. “You can handle all of me, can’t you?”

His hands roamed her body, cupping her breasts, teasing her stomach and sliding over her hips as he continued.

Once the initial stretch was over, the pure ecstasy of it overcame her. She had always heard that sex was nothing special for girls, that they were better just getting themselves off instead of expecting anything from sex. Her first time with Finn had lived up that dismal expectation, but this time with Kylo was going to ruin her for all other men.

She squirmed in his arms, trying to rock back against him and meet him thrust for thrust. The moans and whimpers coming from her throat sounded foreign to her.

He sucked messily at her shoulder and neck, his mouth roaming and claiming her as it went.

Finally he dipped a hand down her stomach and found her clit again. He repeated the same light circle pattern that had worked before and she was seeing stars.

“That’s it, that’s my good girl, cum for me.” He whispered, nipping at her ear lobe and groaning with his own pleasure.

She was his good girl, she wanted to please him.

After a few more circles of his finger, her world exploded. The muscles deep within her, so used to clenching around nothing, now met resistance as they clamped down on his cock like a vice grip.

Some kind of unfamiliar animal sound tore from her throat as the orgasm washed over her entire body and she shuddered with her release.

She felt his cock twitch within her and fill the condom with his spend in response. He gripped her hips so hard she thought it might leave bruises as he muttered her name over and over again into her skin.

It felt so deeply intimate, she couldn’t believe that all sex was like this. No, this had to be different.

After a moment, he began to soften and slip out of her but he sat back and pulled her across his lap as he moved.

She settled in on his thighs, resting her sweaty forehead to his still clothed chest.

“Fuck, Rey, that was…” he trailed off, rubbing soft circles on her lower back with one hand and wrapped the other arm around her to pull her close. He buried his face in her hair, which had come loose from her bun at some point.

Suddenly an overwhelming feeling made her throat constrict. She wanted nothing more to stay and have Kylo take care of her all night. Have him drive her to wherever he lived and make her orgasm until she couldn’t walk straight.

That wasn’t what this was. It was just a quick, one-time fling. She needed to get out of his car, it was suddenly so stuffy. Suffocating.

“I have to go,” she muttered and reached for her discarded clothes. She tried to scoot off his lap but he tightened his hold.

When she looked up at him she expected to see anger but what she got instead was concern.

“Are you okay?” His voice was just as low and soft as it had been when he was encouraging her to cum only a moment ago.

“Yes, fine. Thank you for… this.” She waved a hand to indicate the sex they just had and he paled a little. “I have to get home now.”

She had to leave him before he left her because if just one more person abandoned her she would break.

“Right,” he nodded solemnly. “Can I see you again?”

She swiveled back to him with eyebrows raised. “I didn’t think that’s what this was.”

“It isn’t, or… it wasn’t. But it could be. Please give me your number, Rey.” He wasn’t exactly pleading with her, he still said it with that air of command that made her want to obey. She wanted to give him her number and be his good girl for just a moment longer.

“No.” She said with finality and made even her own heart ache. His shoulders drooped and he nodded again. The corners of his mouth were downturned and she longed to lean over and kiss that mouth as she tugged on her shirt over her bra. She resisted.

“Let me drive you home?”

“That’s not a good idea.”

He observed her silently, his hands sitting at his sides. He still looked cramped in the backseat, but he also looked even more hunched over than before, more deflated.

She found her shorts and pulled them on, not even bothering to see where her underwear got to. He could keep her panties for all she cared.

“Goodnight, Kylo,” she murmured as she scooted to the edge of the seat, opened the door, and walked off into the night.


	2. Power Imbalance

The last week of summer flew by. Rey spent it mostly in the shop working for Plutt, who had conveniently seemed to be too drunk to remember coming at her with fists swinging that night that she had run out of the house. The night with _him._

Her spare time was mostly spent wandering around town with Finn and Rose. There wasn’t much else to do for three errant teenagers in a small town.

Every time they passed through Main Street Rey looked at the spot where Kylo’s car had been parked and she blushed. The memory of his hands on her was enough to set her on fire a week later. Part of her was afraid she would never have anything as good as what happened between her and Kylo.

She decided that she was definitely not going to tell any of her friends, or anyone at all, what had happened that night. It was bad enough she was underage drinking at a bar, she didn’t need to advertise that she seduced a mysterious older man. She didn’t want to deal with the judgement.

Whenever she saw a shiny black car in her peripheral vision, which wasn’t often in such a small backwater town, her head would snap towards it to see if it was his car. It never was.

Now, Rey found herself in front of her locker, resting her forehead against the cool metal and hoping that the year would go by quickly.

“Hey, Peanut, I have to get History, but I’ll see you in Physics?” She almost forgot Finn had joined her at her locker. He was tapping away on his phone, the corners of his lips tugging upwards every so often. Probably texting Rose.

She wasn’t jealous he was texting Rose specifically, more jealous that she couldn’t participate in any text chains since her phone broke and she felt like she was missing out on everything.

Rey managed to salvage what was left of her phone after Plutt had smashed it. The screen was broken beyond all repair so she hadn’t been doing much texting lately. If she tried to run her fingers over the screen, she was afraid they would slice right open. Maybe if she appeased Plutt he would by her a replacement, or at least let her earn her own money in the shop to buy one.

“See you then, fifth period, right?” She began shoving books into her backpack.

“Yup!” Finn confirmed and dashed off down the hallway. She noticed his uniform shirt was untucked, he would get yelled at for that.

There was a new Physics teacher this year, which wouldn’t be that big of a deal at a normal school, but at a high school with only two hundred kids, there wasn’t much else to talk about and it was the talk of the town.

Rose’s sister Paige was an assistant teacher this year and she filled Rose in on the details, who then informed Finn and Rey. The new teacher was actually Principal Organa’s son, Ben Solo. He was working in Coruscant City, but he came back home after some kind of falling out with his company. He had started out as a Physics teacher after college, so he was returning to his roots. It worked out because the old Physics teacher, Mr. Ackbar, was retiring.

Rey wondered if Mr. Solo would be as short as Principal Organa. She imagined a young, male version of the beloved principal spouting off sarcastic remarks between lessons and she suppressed a smile whenever she thought of it.

The day flew by and before she knew it, she was walking into Physics with Finn and Rose at her side, who were chatting away about some new kid in their History class. 

It was like getting electrocuted. Her whole body came to life and simultaneously seized up. She had strolled in to class without a care in the world, and suddenly she knew that her life would never be the same.

Kylo. He was here. He was her teacher? Her brain short circuited.

For a brief moment she thought maybe he had a twin brother, because this Kylo was less put together than the man she slept with last Tuesday. He was wearing a rumpled oxford rolled up his forearms and dark slacks. She wouldn’t get so lucky as that, as soon as he lifted his head to address the class and saw her practically tripping on her own feet, his expression gave it all away.

Whatever words he was about to speak were caught in his throat. He stared at her with his mouth hanging open and only just barely composed himself in time. Before it would become suspicious to the other students. Rey reached her seat and sank as far down as possible in her chair.

With shaking hands, he picked up the syllabus and began to hand it out.

Rey was sure he introduced himself to the class as Mr. Solo. She was sure he went through the syllabus and talked about what they would be covering that semester. She knew all of this, yet if you asked her to recite even just one word of what was said she wouldn’t be able to.

The blood was pounding in her ears so loudly she wouldn’t have been able to hear if the entire marching band paraded through the classroom.

“Miss Niima, can you please stay after class?” Mr. Solo added on as he dismissed them after the period.

Finn looked over from his desk next to her curiously.

“Maybe he just wants to talk to the school’s star Physics student who got the highest grade last year.” Finn nudged her with playfully with his elbow and waggled his eyebrows and Rey tried to sink into her chair further, wishing she could disappear.

It was true, Physics was her favorite class last year. She was good with numbers. She wanted to be an engineer one day. Now she was sure this class would be her own personal hell.

“Yeah, maybe. I’ll catch up with you guys after school.” Rey forced a small smile as Rose and Finn filed out with the rest of the class.

Rey quietly approached Kylo’s desk at the front of the room. He was facing the whiteboard, away from her, gripping the front edge of the desk with white knuckles.

Finally, once the last student was gone he walked over to the door, shut it, and locked it with a resounding _click._

“What. The. Fuck.” He spoke in a deadly calm and even voice. He slowly turned on his heel to face her.

She kept her eyes down, she couldn’t look at his face. That heartbreakingly beautiful face she had been thinking about for a week.

“I’m eighteen.” She whispered. They didn’t break the law. They had sex before either of them knew she was his student, it wasn’t illegal. Just very very unethical, it seemed.

“Well thank fuck for that at least,” his shoulders sagged. He shoved both hands into his hair and gripped it like he was about to tear it all out. “Why did you lie, Rey? Why were you at a bar by yourself drinking?”

She finally looked at him with narrowed eyes.

“It is none of your business why I was at the bar, I certainly hadn’t planned on sleeping with anyone when I went there, if that is what you think. I lied because I was in a bar and I didn’t want to get in trouble! I didn’t think it mattered much to you if I was eighteen or twenty-one.” She crossed her arms in front of her protectively. “What kind of high school teacher drives a Mercedes anyway?”

He ignored her question. It looked like he was chewing on the inside of his cheek the way it hollowed out and his mouth was pinched.

“How about you? Why did _you_ lie, Kylo? Or is it Ben?” Her voice was snippy now, but seriously who lied about their first name like that? People with something to hide.

“Kylo _is_ my name. Or, it was, back in Coruscant. Ben Solo is my birth name. I wanted to separate from my family’s legacy when I left home. But now I’m back.”

She didn’t know what exactly that meant but she decided to pack it away in her mind for later.

He approached the opposite side of the desk from where she stood and leaned over it, gripping the wood so hard she thought it might splinter in his hands.

“What do you need from me?” His voice was resigned and tired. “If you want me to tell my-“ he stopped himself from saying ‘my mother’ she knew, “-the principal everything and quit right now I will.” His face was drawn. It looked like he was holding back from having a panic attack and she felt guilty for putting him in this situation.

“No, why would you do that?” Rey made a scrunched up face like he was talking crazy.

“Because I am in a position of power over you, Rey. It is wrong. Really, really wrong.”

“We will just pretend nothing happened. You weren’t in a position of power when we, uh… when it happened. So nothing was wrong with what we did. We can leave it in the past.” Rey shrugged, gripping her backpack that was dangling at her side.

“I don’t know if I can.” He spoke low, enunciating every word like it was a struggle. When they finally locked eyes again she felt a buzz of heat in her belly and she knew what he meant. Had it been as good for him as it was for her?

Rey gulped nervously.

“Fuck.” He whisper-shouted. “Fuck this podunk town, it doesn’t even have any other Physics teachers that could cover this class. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck!”

He swept his hands across his desk, scattering the spare syllabi across the floor in a flurry of papers. He slammed both fists down on to the table and she nearly jumped out of her own skin.

He looked stricken. “Sorry for slamming the desk.” His voice was hoarse now and muscles in his tense forearms jumped as he attempted to relax. His eyes focused downwards in supplication.

“I can pretend nothing happened. It can be a secret.” Rey murmured, pleading internally that he would calm down and look at her. She wanted to reach out and give him a steadying touch, but she knew that is the last thing that would help this situation so she kept her hands firmly to herself for the time being.

“I don’t know, Rey.” He paused, clenching his fists even tighter. “I don’t know if I can pretend that I didn’t jerk off into a used pair of my student’s panties before coming to work this morning.” He looked at her and his eyes were haunted. She blanched.

She had left her panties in the scramble to get out of his car, she hadn’t taken time to think about him actually doing anything with them. Now she imagined him discovering them and tucking them into his pocket for later. This morning he must have pulled them out as he stretched naked in bed and squeezed them in his fist as he pumped that thick cock of his. Maybe he shoved them in his face and breathed in deep to remember the scent of her.

She squeezed her thighs together to try and relieve some of the tension building inside of her. It shouldn’t make her wet to think about her teacher rubbing her panties along his cock. But it did.

The warning bell for the next period rang and pierced through the silent classroom like a knife.

“We can keep this a secret, I know we can. Don’t do anything drastic, okay?” She reached across the desk and laid her hand over his fist gently. He snatched his hand back like she had burned him. He backed up until his back hit the whiteboard. 

“Okay, okay. Just don’t… don’t do that. Don’t touch me.” His voice just then reminded her of that low commanding voice he used when he told her to cum and she suppressed a shiver, nodded, and darted out of the classroom as fast as she could.

As she retreated she couldn’t help but regret not seeing him naked. He never even took off his clothes.

*

When she got home that afternoon she locked the door to her room, hiked up her uniform skirt, tore off her panties and touched herself in quick, perfunctory motions until she came undone muttering his name. It was a mumbled, messed up combination of Kylo and Mr. Solo.

She was fucked.

The first time in her life when she throws caution to the wind and she ends up sleeping with her teacher in the back of his car. It had been an earth-shattering, mind clearing moment and she was sure the best sex she will ever have. She had even been proud of her ability to calmly walk away from the encounter with no strings attached.

Now her mistake will be following her for the rest of the school yard with those dark eyes and that commanding voice.

Echoes of him murmuring ‘good girl’ into her ear while he fucked her from behind would haunt her. Would he call her a good girl again if she got the highest grades in class? Fuck, she was messed up for thinking that.

No, she was being ridiculous. He was a professional, he clearly was shaken up by what happened and didn’t want to continue it now that he was her teacher. The way he reacted when she tried to touch his hand was evidence enough of that. The last thing she wanted was to tank the man’s career on top of whatever other issues he had going on. If anyone found out… he would never teach again that was for sure.

For the briefest moment she thought about admitting everything to Finn. She couldn’t possibly keep a massive secret bottled up from her best friend for an entire year. She needed so desperately to talk to someone. But she knew that she had to keep her mouth shut. Finn would freak out and run and tell his history teacher Mr. Dameron or do something else crazy that he thought was in her best interest but actually wasn’t.

He looked out for her that way, and her heart swelled thinking of how protective her best friend was over her, but she knew this was a secret that she would have to take to her grave if she didn’t want it getting out.

She pulled out her mangled phone and clicked it on to see if she had any messages. There was a few messages from Finn and Rose in their group chat, recapping their first day of classes, but she couldn’t even text back on the broken screen. She would talk to them tomorrow.

*

The next day in Physics, Kylo resolutely ignored her presence. He must have mentally prepared to see her today and he just let his eyes slide right past her every time he addressed the class.

Rey was also calmer, she could actually listen to him and take notes and focus on the work instead of the man. Or at least that is what she told herself.

Today he was wearing blue slacks and a white button down. She could see the faintest outline of an undershirt beneath the button down and she tried to imagine what his muscles looked like uncovered. She would curse herself every day for the rest of her life for not getting his shirt off when she had the chance.

She was becoming more frustrated with his refusal to make eye contact with her. She raised her hand in response to a few questions he asked, and he always selected another student to answer. The last time she raised her hand, he called on a student who hadn’t even had theirs raised. It didn’t feel good.

He was ruining her favorite subject for her. She didn’t have much to look forward to at home, she didn’t need her favorite part of school being taken away as well.

When the class was supposed to be silently working out a few equations on their own, she kept her eyes fixed on Kylo, trying to will him to look at her. He kept his head down, looking at some paper on his desk. She could see from her vantage point that the paper was nearly blank, there is no way he needed to be looking at it for that long.

She stretched out, raising both hands over her head and cracking her back. She knew her breasts were straining against her white uniform shirt as she did it.

His shoulders tensed and she grinned. He was watching her out of his peripheral vision at least.

The rest of the class quietly continued working out the equation, the room was filled with the sounds of pencils scratching against cheap notebook paper.

Finally, finally, his head snapped up and his gaze locked on her. His eyes were narrowed.

“Miss Niima, it looks like you are done with your work, would you mind sharing with the class your answer for the first equation?” He leaned back in his chair, propping his feet up on the desk expectantly.

He thought he was calling her out for not working on the problems, but she read ahead and finished these equations from the textbook last night.

“Sure, Mr. Solo,” she poured a little extra sugar in her voice when she said his name and he frowned, “the answer is t = .8s.”

“Very good, Miss Niima.” He actually had the nerve to smile at her. He looked pleased. She hated what his praise did to her, she felt that gooey warm feeling spreading at the apex of her thighs. _Very good_ he had said, did that mean she was still his good girl? God, she had wanted to tease him and now she just felt pathetically needy.

This year couldn’t go by fast enough.


	3. Tease

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kylo was doing his best to ignore Rey.

The first few days she spent straining in her seat, raising her hand as high as she possible could, yet he never called on her again.

Weeks went by and she began raising her hand less and less until she gave up all together.

Even Finn noticed.

“What, did you plant dog poop in his desk or something?” Finn leaned across the aisle between them to whisper to her one day while they were working on practice problems.

“I don’t know what his problem is,” she whispered back. She hoped against all hope that Finn would accept that lame excuse and leave it at that.

Of course he didn’t.

“Seriously, he goes out of his way to call on anyone but you, what did he talk to you about the first day of class when he asked you to stay after? You never said.” Finn was trying to act like he was rummaging through his backpack on the ground to disguise their conversation but he was a terrible actor and his eyes kept shifting over to her conspicuously.

“It was nothing, just asking about where we left off last year with Ackbar.” She sunk into her seat, darting her eyes to the front of the classroom to make sure Kylo wasn’t watching them.

“Then why-“ Finn started to speak but was cut off by a deep, low voice from the front of the room.

“Mr. Storm, is there something you would like to share with the class?” Kylo stood from his chair, leaning his hip against his own desk casually. He kept his eyes locked on Finn, not even glancing at Rey.

“Yes, sir, actually I was just wondering why you never call on Rey? She always raises her hand.” Finn sat up straight in his chair, chin out. He would stand up for Rey until his dying day. Normally, this was a trait she loved about him but right now she wanted to crawl in a hole and die.

A red flush crawled up Kylo’s neck and he very briefly slid his eyes over to her. She resisted the urge to put her face in her hands. Her fingers clenched against her faux wood desk.

“Just drop it, Finn,” she hissed over at him. Finn raised his eyebrows, surprised at her reaction.

“Miss Niima seems to have a handle on the material, my aim is to give other students a chance to learn.” Kylo recovered gracefully, looking mostly composed despite his flushed neck and face.

“But-“

“Enough,” Kylo cut him off again. “If Miss Niima has a problem with the way she is treated in my classroom, she can address it with me directly - after class is over.”

Finn looked like he wanted to say something else and Rey wished she was close enough to give him a warning kick. Luckily the deadly glare from their teacher shut him up for the time being.

The rest of the period dragged on, when the bell rang she nearly wept with relief.

Rey tried to slip out of the room unnoticed, walking so that Finn and Rose were between her and Kylo. She couldn’t _look_ at him. She also resented him for ruining this class for her. A ball of fury and shame rolled around her stomach.

“Miss Niima,” the voice that haunted her dreams called out to her. “A word?”

Rey paused, she was so close to the door. Maybe she could just dart out and pretend she hadn’t heard him.

Finn looked at her with a guilty expression she normally would have found funny but right now was infuriating. “Sorry,” he mouthed the word without vocalizing it and shuffled out of the class with Rose at his side.

When the class was empty except for the two of them, she closed the door. She hiked her backpack up higher on her shoulder so she didn’t need to hold it.

“Yes, Mr. Solo?” She bit her tongue, refraining from calling him Kylo. She promised she would act like nothing happened between them and that is what she would continue to attempt to do.

He sank into the well worn chair behind his desk and observed her quietly. His pouty lips were pressed together in a tight line. She suspected he was holding back, hiding words behind those lips that he didn’t want getting out.

All of the windows in the classroom were open due to a lack of air conditioning in this wing of the school. A light breeze swept in, rustling some of the papers on his desk and lightly tousling a few strands of his hair around his neck.

She bristled, smoothing her uniform skirt with sweaty palms. She was wearing tights under her skirt and the room felt unbearably hot.

“I’m sorry, Rey.” He finally decided on his words, it seemed. It took him long enough to come out with such a simple apology.

“Why are you doing it?” She frowned and felt the need to clarify. “Ignoring me?”

“It’s the only way I can stay sane.” He leveled her with a stare that made her thighs twitch. “I can’t even look at you without thinking about what I did to you. Even when I close my eyes, it’s like it’s burned into my fucking eyelids.”

She cleared her throat. “You mean what we did, Mr. Solo. You didn’t do anything to me that I didn’t… invite.”

“Don’t call me that.” His voice was sharp and curt. “Not you.”

“What should I call you then?”

“Just don’t… don’t say my name. Call me Mr. Solo in class if you absolutely have to.” He ran a large hand down his face and moved it to rub the back of his neck anxiously.

“You can’t do this to me. I’ve been doing my best to pretend nothing happened between us. You can’t keep ignoring me. It’s not fair.” Rey resisted the urge to stomp her foot. Her hands were balling into fists at her sides.

“I don’t know what else to do.” His eyes were fixed down on his desk, ignoring her.

“Please, don’t take this away from me. Physics was my best subject.” She shifted on her feet, debating if she should say what she really wanted to say. “It’s _all_ I have.”

He finally looked up at her. His eyes were sunken and he looked paler than she remembered.

“I’m doing my best, Rey.”

She couldn’t help but wonder if she wasn’t the only thing that was troubling him. It looked like the weight of the world was on his shoulders in that moment. He couldn’t be this disturbed about their one night stand alone, there had to be something else going on in that head of his.

“Why did you come back to this town? You never said.” She felt like he was on the precipice of revealing something. Something big.

His mouth twitched ever so slightly and his lips parted.

The sound of the warning bell for the next class tore through the silent, heavy air.

Kylo’s eyes darted around like he was coming out of a trance.

“Get to class.” He instructed and stood up to organize some papers into a pile. It was a clear dismissal.

*

Rey decided she wasn’t going to take this treatment lying down. If he wanted to ignore her she was going to make it so that she was impossible to ignore.

The next morning she got up early to get in the bathroom before Plutt roused from his drunken slumber. She shaved her legs, perched on the edge of the bathtub. When she got to the apex of her thighs she hesitated for a moment, shrugged, and continued her shaving work until she was completely bare.

It was the first time that she had shaved herself like this and when she looked in the mirror, she blushed. She couldn’t tell if she looked obscene, with all of her folds and lady bits on display, or pathetically childish with the absence of hair. She tried to convince herself it looked mature and womanly. Sexual, even.

She discreetly cleaned up all of her supplies, tugged her pajamas back on and snuck back to her room.

In her room she dove headfirst into her sock drawer, pulling out a pair of navy blue knee socks to match her uniform skirt. Most days she wore leggings or tights with her skirt because it was more comfortable and she didn’t have to worry about shaving her legs as often, so these socks were buried pretty deep.

She got dressed in her uniform, carefully smoothing everything out so she looked more put together than she felt. After rolling up her knee socks, she examined herself in the mirror.

Something was missing. She considered her outfit for a moment and then rolled the top of her skirt up beneath her uniform shirt so it was about a hands length shorter, revealing a creamy expanse of freshly shaved and lotioned thigh. She nodded at her reflection, that should do the trick.

The day dragged by until it was almost time for fifth period. Rey excused herself with a bathroom pass from her fourth period class with ten minutes to remain, she knew that Kylo had lunch fourth period so he should be in the teacher’s lounge, leaving his classroom empty and unlocked.

She walked down the hallway briskly, knowing that if someone intercepted her she would have to change her route because there were no bathrooms at the end of this particular hallway.

She finally slipped inside her destination and took a deep, shuddering breath. The class was empty and still. Even the windows were shut up tight, making the class more stuffy than ever. She clicked the door shut behind her and stepped over to his desk quickly.

With one more fortifying breath, she reached up her skirt and tugged her panties down her legs. The left leg hole snagged on her shoe and she nearly tripped and crashed into the corner of his desk. She could only imagine the chaos she would stir up if she was found dead from a head injury at the front of Kylo’s classroom with her panties twisted around her ankles.

Once she was stable, she was able to remove them the rest of the way. She tugged on the top drawer of his desk, only to find it locked. She huffed. The next drawer beneath it slid open, thankfully. It was filled with boxes of pencils and some blank scantron forms for testing. She deposited her underwear neatly atop the pencils. She took a moment to admire her handiwork, her underwear was pale pink with a thin lace trim, it was the best pair she owned. She almost regretted giving them up for this.

At the last minute she decided to rip a blank page out of a memo pad he had sitting atop his desk and she scrawled out a hasty note. She tucked it gently behind the panties.

She slid the drawer shut and made her exit.

Her heart was pounding in her throat and as she got back to her fourth period class, the bell was just ringing to dismiss them. Walking back to the Physics room was a blur.

She sank into her chair on shaking legs, making to smooth her skirt beneath her bottom as she sat so her bare ass wasn’t making contact with the seat.

Kylo was typing out something on his laptop, he looked mostly calm and relaxed and she was sure he hadn’t made the discovery yet. His eyes still had the same bags under them that she saw yesterday, though.

When the next bell rang he reluctantly closed his laptop and got up to begin the class.

Once again, she couldn’t hear the sound of him lecturing over the blood pounding in her ears.

They reached the portion of class where he assigned them some practice problems from the textbook to work on quietly at their desks.

“Mr. Solo, may I borrow a pencil?” Kaydel Connix, another senior that Rey was mildly aquatinted with, asked with a raised hand.

Rey watched as Kylo rolled his eyes and went to reach for the drawer. This was a key part of Rey’s plan, almost every day someone asked to borrow a pencil. She wasn’t sure if she wanted to release a breath of relief that someone had asked today, or if she wanted to throw up.

She heard the soft sliding of the drawer opening and Kylo turned to grab a pencil box and he froze, mid-reach. His shoulders seemed to seize up, almost like he saw a spider or some other equally detestable bug resting inside the drawer. Rey knew what he was looking at. Her pink panties and a note that said ‘ _I won’t be ignored._ ’ She knew that he knew her handwriting by now. Even if he didn’t, who else but her would leave panties in his drawer?

“Mr. Solo?” Kaydel prompted after he had stared at the contents of his drawer for far too long.

He shook his head and grabbed a pencil box. Rey knew that he had to push aside her panties to grab the box of Ticonderogas. She wondered if he let his fingers linger, would he feel that they were still warm?

He slipped a pencil out and slammed it down on the corner of his desk, nearly breaking the thing in half. Kaydel nervously scooted out of her seat and retrieved the pencil, unsure of what she might have done to upset him.

Rey never took her eyes off him.

Normally while they worked on their equations, he took the time to grade or get some work done on his laptop. Today, he sat in his chair, staring down at his desk, brows furrowed. He looked truly angry. His jaw was set, a muscle jumping along his jawline every minute or so. He still hadn’t looked up at her. Why wouldn’t he look up at her?

As if he could read her thoughts, his eyes snapped up to lock onto hers. His expression was fire and fury and… something else.

She gulped.

Well it was now or never, the final phase of her plan to get his attention.

Rey slowly and steadily let her knees fall apart from where they were pressed together tightly beneath her desk. He kept his eyes locked on her face but she knew he could see what she was doing. She shifted her thighs just a little farther apart than they would naturally fall in a relaxed position. The cool breeze she felt was a confirmation that she was on full display for him.

His eyes finally flickered down, unable to help himself. There was agony etched across his features now. She couldn’t see his hands at his sides when he was sitting, but the way his biceps bunched and curled beneath his oxford she was sure they were clenched in tight fists. A dark flush sat high on his cheeks.

She wondered if he could see how wet she was from there, was her slit glistening with her arousal? Did he like her shaved like this? Or did he prefer her how she was before, with a light dusting of coarse hair?

Her entire body was on fire under his gaze, she remembered the time he pressed one long finger into her in the back seat of his car and made her come apart on his hand. Would he do that again with her spread out for him atop his desk?

Finally, he tore his eyes away and fixed his gaze out the window. His chest was rising and falling with deep breaths. He looked like he was about ready to punch a hole in the wall.

She closed her legs. All she could do now was press her thighs together and ignore the needy slickness between them.

She got his attention, finally. She even got a surprisingly visceral reaction out of him. That was what she wanted. Why did it feel so hollow?

The rest of the class played out quickly. He barely spoke, only to call on students to provide their answers and assign homework. He didn’t get up from his desk and he didn’t look at her again.

The bell rang and it was over.

She stood to gather her stuff, bending over to grab her backpack from the floor. She forgot how short her skirt was today.

“Nice stems, Niima, where've you been hiding those?” Snap Wexley was grinning at her from the seat to her left. She felt her face burning with an embarrassed blush and she tugged her skirt down a bit. Snap was always sort of a class clown, and she knew it was just some playful teasing.

Just as she was about to open her mouth to deliver a snarky reply, Kylo cut her off.

“Wexley, that will be a detention. Today at three o’clock.” Kylo’s voice snapped from the front of the room. Snap’s head swiveled to look at the front of the room, his lips were still upturned from a smile, thinking that surely Mr. Solo was just joking. His face fell when Kylo’s serious glower didn’t fade.

“Mr. Solo, you can’t be serious.” Snap’s expression was earnest and pleading. Rey felt a stab of guilt. He didn’t deserve a detention for a silly comment like that. This was just Kylo punishing her for what she did today.

“I am entirely serious, Mr. Wexley. That will actually now be two detentions - one for your comment and one for talking back.” Kylo turned to his desk to pack up their homework and his laptop into his black leather satchel.

Snap gaped like a fish, his mouth opening and closing several times. Rey could tell that he was dying to plead his case, but he was also afraid to earn more detentions. Finally, his face fell and he packed up his stuff resignedly.

“I’m so sorry about your detention, I know you didn’t mean anything by it,” Rey whispered to Snap as they began to shuffle towards the door. She reached out and gave Snap’s arm a light squeeze and he offered her a small smile she hoped meant that he forgave her.

“Miss Niima, that skirt isn’t regulation. Fix it or I’ll send you to the nurse’s office for a change of clothes.” Kylo spoke without looking at her, his eyes fixed on the homework papers he was organizing.

She tugged it down, unrolling the top and smoothing it out until it was well within the school’s regulated length. She huffed and stormed from the room with the crowd of students before he had the opportunity to say anything else.


	4. The Ruined Text

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all for your patience and support. Sorry for the delay with this chapter! I've been going through a tough time in my personal life and sometimes that gets in the way of my schedule, but I won't forget about any of my fics.
> 
> I actually wrote this chapter about two weeks ago, but it was off and I couldn't put my finger on what was bothering me. So I sat on it and ended up completely re-writing the chapter, I think I was trying to make too much happen at once. So hopefully this chapter isn't boring as hell!

Rey spent the last two periods of the school day quietly fuming. She was furious with Kylo for giving Snap Wexley a detention over a silly comment on her legs. She was also annoyed that she didn’t get the self-righteous satisfaction she had hoped to gain from teasing Kylo. The clammy dampness of her arousal on her upper thighs wasn’t helping with her general feelings of frustration and anger. She wished she could have stomped up there and snatched her underwear back before walking out of his classroom. He truly didn’t deserve them.

All Rey wanted was to participate in Physics, her favorite subject. Now she was certain he would ignore her even harder and more diligently than before.

When she got to her locker at the end of the day, she found a note had been slipped inside and was resting atop her hefty stack of notebooks and textbooks. The words were penned in his looping, elegant script. Even his ink was smooth and black, he probably thought he was too good for a normal ballpoint.

_Meet me after school. -K_

She crumpled the scrap of paper in her fist. It was paper from the same memo pad that she wrote her note on.

How dare he summon her like this? Now she would miss her bus and have to wait three hours for the late bus or make the long walk home to Plutt’s lot alone.

She took in a few deep breaths, considering her options. She could blow him off and get on the bus, he couldn’t exactly punish her for not meeting him, she was sure he wouldn’t want to draw attention to her, at least not in relation to him. Or she could go and meet him and see what he has to say for himself.

The part of her that desperately wanted his approval, wanted to be his _good girl_ again, made the decision for her.

She loitered around, making small talk with her classmates, until the buses departed and everyone with after school activities headed off to their respective meeting places. When the coast was clear, she made her way to the isolated hallway that housed the Physics room.

The door was cracked so she pushed her way in without knocking and shut the door behind her.

Kylo was seated at his desk, his elbows propped on small stacks of papers that she identified as their quizzes from earlier in the week, and his forehead was cradled in his hands. His palms were jammed into his eye sockets, rubbing back and forth like he wanted to wipe away everything he saw today.

She cleared her throat but he didn’t bother looking up. Instead he let his hands fall away and kept his eyes fixed downward.

“What are you doing, Rey?” He spoke with a sigh that could only be described as weary.

“You asked me here.” She frowned, almost reaching for the crumbled up note stuffed at the bottom of the backpack dangling at her side. Her proof.

“I know. I called you here to ask you what the hell you are doing.” He finally looked up at her and she noticed his hair was unkempt and pushed back, as if he had been running his hands through it. She wanted to touch it. She remembered the way little tendrils clung to his sweaty forehead after he fucked her. The way the longer strands tickled her skin as he spread kisses over her neck and shoulders.

“I told you, I just want to participate in class.” She jutted her chin out defiantly.

“You are being a brat.” He hissed through clenched teeth.

“What are you going to do about it then? Take me over your knee and spank me?” Rey gripped the straps of her backpack a little tighter.

“Don’t fucking tempt me, Rey.” He leveled her with a glare that told her she wouldn’t enjoy it very much if he did. His hands were in tight fists on his desk in front of him. Despite his stern look and harsh voice, she still found herself squirming. She wanted a red mark in the shape of his hand across her ass. She knew the man she slept with that night would take care of her if she let him.

“Did you enjoy the view in class today?” She wasn’t sure why she was egging him on. Maybe because his reaction to her panties in his drawer was the most she has gotten out of him since school started and she wanted more of it. She craved it.

Rey had long accepted that she wasn’t going to get attention from any kind of parental figure. She didn’t even particularly crave attention from her friends, she actually preferred to hang back more and keep her distance. She has always been a loner. Until Kylo. She recognized something in him that called to something in her, a lonely desperation. Kylo was the first person she ever met that she wanted in that way. She wanted him to want her, more than anything.

He narrowed his eyes and stared at her face quietly.

“What do you want from me, exactly?” He bit the words out, slowly and carefully. “Even if you weren’t my student, even if you were older, I have nothing to give you. I’m a thirty year old fuckup who ran home to mommy after my life in the city went to fucking pieces.”

Rey shifted her weight from one foot to the other, watching him. She wanted to know what happened to him, who had hurt him. A strange desire for violence was bubbling in her, a fierce protectiveness over him.

“The best part, the fucking best part, is that the first thing I do when I get home is fuck my student in the back of my car.” His breathing was erratic now, she was half afraid he might have a panic attack. He bit out every word like it pained him. “I can’t even fail properly, I just fuck up my life in two different towns rather than one.”

So many questions were rolling around on her tongue, itching to fall out of her mouth. She pressed her lips together tightly, now wasn’t the time.

“I went from living in a penthouse overlooking Coruscant Park to a studio apartment overlooking a fucking liquor store, and even this meager life I can’t get quite right.”

She quietly resented him for calling his life in this town meager, if his life was meager, what was hers? She let it pass, acknowledging her emotions, but not dwelling on them.

When he didn’t say anything else she moved closer to his desk quietly until she was standing beside him. His shoulders were so tense she thought he might pull a muscle.

She longed to reach a hand out and lay it across his shoulder, soothing him.

“I’m sorry, Mr. Solo.” Her words were whispered and oddly nurturing. She wanted to ease his pain. “I won’t push it anymore, I’m really sorry.”

There was a moment of silence as he absorbed her words.

“I’ll do better with you, I’ll call on you more in class. I owe it to you to be the adult in this situation.” He finally looked up at her and his eyes were surprisingly bloodshot, like he hasn't slept in days.

“Thank you, Mr. Solo.” His name felt warm and tangible in her mouth.

The right corner of his lips turned up, ever so slightly.

“You’re smart, Rey, really smart. Scary smart. You should be focusing on what colleges you are applying to and not worrying about your fuckup of a teacher.” He sunk back into his chair, some of the tension leaving his taught body.

“Oh, yeah… well, who knows if I’ll even go to college.” She shrugged. For some reason she didn’t want to lie to him like she lied to everyone else about her intentions to go to college. Whenever someone brought up college she nodded and smiled politely like she thought it was a possibility. Maybe she wanted to believe her own lie. She didn’t want to just be polite with Ben.

She wanted to be an engineer, she wanted to change the world. But she was no one from nowhere with no resources.

“Excuse me?” He arched a brow at her, back to his prickly Mr. Solo personality, no longer the vulnerable Kylo willing to talk to her like an equal.

“College isn’t for everyone,” she said.

“It’s for you.” He gestured at her and folded his arms across his stomach. His lips were pinched as he observed her.

“I doubt I could afford it, and my guardian, Plutt, owns the scrapyard and the car dealership in town, he probably makes too much money for me to qualify for financial aid.” She scuffed her shoe on the ground, avoiding his eyes.

“He won’t help pay for your school?”

“No.” That was all she was going to say about that.

After another quiet moment he stood from his chair, the old wheels squealing in protest as he pushed it back. He moved to the small bookshelf next to his desk and pulled out three books, each slightly thicker than the last.

The three books thudded to his desk in front of her, a small dust cloud rolling away from them.

“My college textbooks, I dug them out of storage at the beginning of the school year,” he indicated the stack, “I want you to start with this one on top. You breeze through all the work I assign in this class without even having to listen to my lecture. You should try and push yourself a little, if you can understand these concepts on your own maybe I could work something out with the local college to let you take their tests and get some college credit. It’s a start, at least. I would hate to see that brain of yours get stuck in this town with the rest of us.”

She regarded the books warily before scooping them up and hugging them tightly to her chest. They were heavy and smelled like they’ve been sitting in a basement for ten years, but she was bursting to get home and look at them more closely when he wasn’t standing there watching her.

“Thank you, I will take a look.” Her face was schooled into a mask of calm neutrality. Her thirst for knowledge, her love for Physics, and her desire to please Kylo all hummed contentedly within her, appeased by this offering of books.

He was standing close to her, an earnest grin on his face. He was so close she had to crane her neck to look up at his face. In that moment she could see why he wanted to teach, it gave him genuine joy to pass on knowledge.

Neither of them heard the door click open.

“Oh Ben, I didn’t know you were having a student after school today.” Principal Organa breezed into the room, her short heels making clipped little clacking sounds against the floor. She looked so polished and put together, even in some plain slacks and a flowy blouse with a vest cinched over it.

Rey nearly jumped out of her skin, she took a quick step back away from Kylo, only realizing how guilty it made her look after it was too late. Kylo stood his ground stubbornly and looked over Rey’s head to his mother, he hadn’t backed away.

“Miss Niima was just about to leave, she was asking for some supplementary material so I dug out my old college textbooks for her.” He indicated the books still clutched in her arms.

“Rey always excelled at Physics, she is one of our brightest students.” Principal Organa gave her a warm smile and Rey returned it, straightening her back.

“Yes, she must be bored out of her mind in my class,” he intoned.

“Nonsense, I’m sure you make it interesting,” she waved a hand dismissively. “I’m so glad you’ve taken to Rey, I knew you two would get on.”

Rey could see Kylo nearly choke at his mother’s turn of phrase. Mercifully, he kept his composure.

“You two are just alike, Rey reminds me so much of young Ben. Smart and quiet, with something else lurking beneath the surface.” The principal observed her for a moment, her fingers pressed against her chin thoughtfully.

“Yes, well… let’s hope she’s not too much like me.” Kylo’s deep voice rumbled next to Rey, but she kept her gaze on the principal who was now frowning at Kylo. She wondered how much Principal Organa knew of her son’s issues, Rey was dying to know herself what had gone so wrong for him. Why was he back here? What happened in Coruscant?

“Rey, I’m sorry but I have to steal my son away for a few minutes” She turned her focus on Kylo. “I did have something I wanted to meet with you about, Ben, which you would know if you didn’t spend all day ignoring my emails.”

“Oh, I was just leaving, I got my books now I should get home.” Rey hefted the heavy texts up further on her chest and smiled politely. “Good afternoon, Mr. Solo, Principal Organa.”

“Take care, Rey.” Principal Organa nodded her head as Rey made her exit, Kylo didn’t say anything.

*

Things got better after that, between her and Kylo. He called on her an appropriate amount in class considering she raised her hand for every question. She felt like a part of the discussion again.

Finn, of course, claimed credit for this turn of events. She let him continue to think it was his doing.

She didn’t leave any more pairs of panties in his drawers, aside from the fact that she hardly had many pairs to spare, she wanted to give him space. She didn’t want to push his buttons now that she was on his good side.

It didn’t escape her notice that he never returned either the pair she left in his desk or the pair she left in his car that first night.

Every night that she could get away from working in the shop for Plutt, she spent pouring over Kylo’s textbooks. She especially treasured finding the little notes he left in some of the margins. She imagined a frazzled young Ben Solo, about her age, forgetting his notebook and having no other choice but to mark up his textbook when he didn’t want to let an errant thought escape him. His handwriting in the margins was a far cry from the loopy script he used now, but she could see his personality in it still, it was cursive, but jagged and rushed.

Sometimes he must have pressed the pen into the glossy textbook paper too hard, so that it left indents on the page beneath it. Rey liked to run her fingertips over the phantom writing he left behind.

She would work on the practice problems for each chapter and hand them in to him at the beginning of class. He would pass them back to her with the rest of the class’s homework with detailed notes and minor corrections or direction where it was needed. She always got chills reading the positive comments he left behind. Every ‘ _very good_ ’ made her want to jump his bones. 

Things were going so well until Unkar Plutt found out she was doing extra school work.

“That is the third different textbook I’ve seen you with this week,” Plutt eyed her suspiciously as he entered the garage with another batch of work orders for her. “What kind of school am I sending you to?”

“It’s just for my Physics class,” Rey replied casually. She had cracked one of Kylo’s textbooks open to read for a minute while she waited for the oil to drain out of an old Corolla she was working on. She closed the book and tried to stuff it back into her backpack on the floor, she knew she wouldn’t get any reading done with Plutt hovering over her, but his fat hand darted out with surprising speed and gripped her wrist tight.

“University Physics?” He was raising an eyebrow at the big, bold letters on the text’s cover.

He ripped the book out of her hand and began flipping through it. She wanted to snatch it back, she couldn’t stand the sight of his greasy hands defiling Kylo’s book, but she didn’t want to escalate the situation. Like he even knew what he was looking at.

“This is what they are teaching you idiot kids?” He looked up at her over the top of the book. Suspicion glinted in his beady eyes.

“Not exactly, my teacher gave me these books for some supplemental reading.” Her fingers itched but she kept her hands firmly at her sides.

“This is a distraction, girl,” he growled. He snapped the book shut and palmed it in one hand, wiggling it in front of her. “Don’t make me call the school and have a word with them about distracting you with unnecessary work.”

“It really isn’t, I still get all my work done in the shop.” She inched closer, debating snatching it back and making a run for it.

“I’ll be the judge of that.” He dropped the book into a nearby bucket filled with grey soapy water.

Rey cried out, leaping forward and knocking the bucket over in her attempt to save the book. Dingy water flowed over the shop floor like a cascading river and Ben’s textbook with it. It was completely ruined, stained and warped by the water.

She didn’t have time to mourn the book because Plutt let out a furious yell at the mess she made. The water soaked into his shoes and continued spreading out in a bloom across the oil stained floor. She could tell by the unflattering red shade of his face that he was about five seconds from swinging at her.

Without a second thought, she snatched up the sopping wet book and dashed out of the open garage door, leaving Plutt screaming intelligible curses in her wake.

As she usually did when she ran from Plutt, she bolted towards town. It was really the only way to go, if she were to head the opposite direction down the road there was nothing around but farmland and empty fields for miles. The scrapyard was on the fringes of town, as most undesirable heaps of garbage tend to be.

She clung the soggy book to her chest, it was soaking through her grey t-shirt, but she didn’t particularly care. This was a shirt she had worn through countless oil changes and it wasn’t exactly in pristine condition to begin with.

It wasn’t yet so late that businesses were closed. The summer sun hung low in the sky, but there was still another hour of daylight. She walked along the main street slowly, she had time to kill.

Just when she thought that it might be a good idea to get off the main road in case Plutt drove by looking for her, she spotted the liquor store. It was a modest little place, it really only sold a handful of different brands, nothing exotic or craft, but it did the job for the folks in this town.

Rey remembered Kylo’s earlier words. ‘ _I went from living in a penthouse overlooking Coruscant Park to a studio apartment overlooking a fucking liquor store_ ,’ he had said.

She dragged her eyes from the liquor store to the building across the street, a small hobby shop with very limited opening hours and a second floor that looked very much like it could be an apartment. There was a small alley to the side of the building and as she approached she saw the glint of his shiny black mercedes parked there.

There was a nondescript glass door on the side of the building. A beat up old metal mailbox hung desperately to the brick next to the door. She pulled the handle tentatively and it opened right up. Scuffed linoleum tiled stairs took her up to a second floor landing with a much sturdier looking wooden door.

She reached out her hand and rapped her knuckle on it hesitantly.

The door whipped open and Kylo had to dart his eyes down at her as if he expected someone much taller to be at his door. He was wearing a pair of track pants and a black t-shirt. Despite the fact that she was ambushing him in his own home, she was surprised to see him dressed so casual. It was the most she had ever seen of his arms and his right bicep flexed as he gripped the doorframe.

“Christ, Rey, what are you doing here?” He looked stricken as he gripped her by the upper arm and dragged her inside, peaking out to look down the stairs as if he was checking to see if someone followed her. He shut the door with a soft _snick_ and clicked the deadbolt shut. For some reason, it seemed logical that he would lock the door behind her. He looked like a man trying to keep something out rather than trying to keep her in. He turned to face her cautiously, leaning back against the door.

“I’m sorry… I just saw the liquor store and your car and I figured you lived here.” She regretted coming up here, she wanted to run back out the door but he was blocking the way with his big body. The soggy book was now dangling in her grip at her side and she brought it up to offer it to him. “I ruined your book. I’m really sorry, it was an accident. Please don’t be mad.”

“You came all the way here to tell me about the book?” He gently took it from her grasp and turned it over in his hands, examining the mushy, pulpy mass. “What happened to it?”

“I dropped it in some water, I’m really sorry. I’ll pay for a replacement.” She wasn’t sure where she would get the money but she couldn’t stand the thought of not reimbursing him.

“Don’t worry about it, this edition has probably been out of print for a decade, it’s worthless.” He shook his head and tossed it onto the nearby kitchen counter.

Then she realized that everything in the apartment was technically nearby, it was insanely tiny.

A dishevelled double bed was shoved into a corner and she couldn’t help but picture him tossing and turning in his sleep with his feet dangling over the edge. There was a single loveseat couch across from a small box TV with a card table for a stand. The kitchen didn’t even bother with a table, he must take his meals perched on the stool she spotted tucked under the counter. A half-eaten microwave dinner sat there, it still had steam coming off it. Her heart ached for him.

“Are you going to tell me why you’re really here?” He shuffled back over to the counter and picked up his microwave dinner, poking at it with a plastic fork but not actually raising any food to his mouth.

“I’m hiding out. Just like I was that night at the bar.” His eyes flashed in annoyance at her as she brought up that fateful night.

“Who are you hiding from?” His annoyance was replaced with concern and his eyes softened.

“My guardian. He found out I was doing extra work and dropped your textbook into a bucket of water. I spilled it and he was angry with me so I ran.” The words tumbled out of her mouth like vomit.

“Why would you run?” His voice was low and he dropped his half eaten meal back onto the countertop.

“Sometimes he gets brave enough to take a swing at me, usually when he is drunk. This is the first time he has ever come at me sober, though.” She shrugs.

“Come at you?” Ben’s voice was dangerously cold. “Why the hell haven’t you told anyone at school?”

“I’m telling you,” she murmured, looking away from his assessing gaze.

“I mean before this, if you report him someone can help you.”

“Help me how? Shuffle me into the foster system? I doubt there are many foster parents in this town, at least I know Plutt and what he is capable of.” She crossed her arms and glared up at him. “It’s too late for that now anyway, I’m eighteen.”

“Rey, you should have told the school,” he whispered. He was standing close now and he reached up to grip her shoulders softly. The gesture was tender and kind and it made her stomach drop. “You can still talk to the school counselor, maybe there are resources that can help you find your own place.”

“A place like this?” She looked around the cramped studio apartment with a quirked eyebrow. “Jesus, your car alone must cost twice as much as this whole building. Why do you live here?”

“I left my old life in a hurry. I kept the car.” He shrugged and his fingers rubbed over her shoulders he still held in his hands mindlessly. She melted a little. Did he even realize how casually he touched her? “Don’t change the subject, you need to get out of that house. You should set up an appointment with the guidance counselor first thing in the morning.”

“Just drop it, Mr. Solo. I can take care of myself. I know how to lay low when he gets in one of his moods.” She shrugged his hands off her against all of her instincts and stepped back a pace.

“What happens when his mood sneaks up on him next time?” Kylo’s voice was dark. “If he lays so much as a finger on you I swear I’ll-”

“You’ll what? Drop by and lay him out? Kill him? Don’t be such a drama queen.”

“Maybe I will.” Kylo spoke in a low voice that was entirely too serious for her comfort.

Out of the corner of her eye she noticed something pink that stood out like a sore thumb in his drab apartment.

Her pink panties were crumpled up on the small nightstand wedged next to his bed.

His eyes followed hers and saw what she was seeing. His serious face melted and went beet red. He tried to side step her, blocking her view of the nightstand with his body. It was too late for that, though.

She looked up at him with an accusing smirk and he blushed even deeper.

He opened his mouth to make an excuse but then shut it with a clack of his teeth. There was nothing he could say to justify keeping a pair of his student’s panties on his nightstand.

“I should probably take those back,” she smiled playfully and made to move around him towards the end table.

“No, I don’t think that is a good idea,” his voice cracked, it actually cracked like he was a goddamn teenager, and he blocked her path again. She bumped into his firm chest. It felt warm beneath the thin t-shirt.

“Why is that, Mr. Solo?” She looked up at him with wide eyes and her best innocent face. She reached up to trail her fingers down his arm and he jerked back violently, nearly tripping over the back of his couch.

In the back of her mind she registered the fact that she was wearing the same jean shorts that she wore the night they had sex.

“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have kept them, I’m really sorry. But trust me, you don’t them back. I’ll just throw them out!” He jumped over a stray laundry basket in a burst of agility and scooped up the offending garment.

“Of course I want them back, Mr. Solo.” Her voice was teasing and she let out a bleat of laughter as she followed him to the other side of the room, reaching up to grab her underwear as he held them out of reach.

In her mind, he jerked off into them just before she arrived, maybe his cum was still warm and sticky on the soft fabric.

She jumped up with all her strength and got surprisingly close to grabbing them out of his hand. The front of her body rubbed against the front of his as she reached, her pert breasts pressing into his chest. He stepped back from her at the contact, the backs of his legs knocking into his bed. He reached out his free hand to grab her shoulder and keep her at arm’s length.

Even though she was sure he was truly desperate to keep the underwear from her, his face was split into a grin at the sight of her struggle.

That grin made her stomach flutter. His crooked teeth and wide mouth somehow made him even more handsome. He looked young.

“You should smile more.” She meant to sound casual but instead it came out breathy and soft.

As soon as she said it, she wished she could take it back. Her words made him remember himself.

“You should probably go, Rey.” His face was somber now, she both hated and loved how his expression were so easy to read. His pouty lips were pressed together, broadcasting his feelings. “Will it be safe for you now?”

He tucked her panties into his pocket. His hand lingered there.

She shrugged. “I’ll probably just sneak in the back and hide out in my room.”

“Promise me you’ll talk to someone about your guardian tomorrow?”

“Maybe,” she looked down. She noticed he was wearing socks and thought how domestic it looked.

“You’ll talk to someone or I will for you,” he growled.

“Yeah? You’ll tell the school you found out I was being mistreated when I ran to your apartment? That I knew you lived here because I recognized the car you fucked me in?” She crossed her arms in front of her.

“Don’t do this, Rey. I’m just trying to help.” She could tell he was trying to reign in his anger. A vein bulged in his neck but he kept his voice level. He probably thought she was just acting out, a typical teenager.

“Just forget I came here. I’m sorry for bothering you.” She turned on her heel and made for the door, unlocking it swiftly. She heard him shuffle forward awkwardly across the cluttered floor behind her. Not quite chasing after her, maybe he was holding himself back.

“Rey…” His voice was quiet, beseeching. She squared her shoulders and walked out the door.

“Night, Mr. Solo,” she spoke over her shoulder, not turning back. “Sorry about your book.”

**Author's Note:**

> Comments give me life.
> 
> Tumblr: [edawn](http://edawn.tumblr.com)


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